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"And some just have to pee on the electric fence themselves."
Officially, I'm the company web expert. Unofficially, I handle a little of everything, at least until the staff bulks up a bit more. Until recently, that included all the "copy" (text meant for advertising and promotional purposes), but the boss is testing out a new professional writer, Dyan, who will probably take over those duties and free me up for other stuff.
That doesn't mean we don't proofread her material, though. The boss asked me to check out something long Dyan had written just this Monday. I read it through, made some grammar corrections, noted where the flow could be improved, etc. I also advised her to completely rewrite one section on the grounds that it had no energy whatsoever and didn't adequately express its main point: namely, it stated that we could "do X for you because" and then rattled off a brief list of features that had no apparent connection to accomplishing X.
Fast forward to this morning. I'd gotten back Dyan's second draft. Some bits still needed work, but the section I mentioned above? Dramatic improvement. Along with making X itself sound much more desirable to have, she connected all the features in a way that clearly indicated how they accomplished X. I scribbled a big "GOOD!" on it; it was so much better.
But this being the second draft, the boss wanted a look at it himself (and I wanted him to look too, considering the exact status of our price and guarantee were in flux and up to him). ...and like a fool, I brought along the first draft as well. And I thought I'd complement Dyan by pointing out her rapid improvement on that one section. And Boss-man turns and says: "Why is it better?"
And despite my explanation about the improved energy, the better descriptions, and the way it all ties together; and finally my pleas that dammit, it's better, how can you not see it's superior in every way, like Philostrate begging Theseus to realize that "Pyramus and Thisbe" was not a "must see"... he just kept saying "we can't know for sure just yet." He wants to have two versions of this piece made, one with this particular section altered, and one with it exactly as it was in the first draft. He wants to see for himself which one gets the better response.
He was fine with all the other changes, most of which were minor, some of which probably won't make a bit of difference in terms of how many sales it draws in. He came up with several more changes on the spot and never acted like he wasn't sure they were good changes. Everything will be incorporated in both of the final drafts... except that one section change, which half our audience will now never see.
Sometimes I think he's doing this just to annoy me.
Officially, I'm the company web expert. Unofficially, I handle a little of everything, at least until the staff bulks up a bit more. Until recently, that included all the "copy" (text meant for advertising and promotional purposes), but the boss is testing out a new professional writer, Dyan, who will probably take over those duties and free me up for other stuff.
That doesn't mean we don't proofread her material, though. The boss asked me to check out something long Dyan had written just this Monday. I read it through, made some grammar corrections, noted where the flow could be improved, etc. I also advised her to completely rewrite one section on the grounds that it had no energy whatsoever and didn't adequately express its main point: namely, it stated that we could "do X for you because" and then rattled off a brief list of features that had no apparent connection to accomplishing X.
Fast forward to this morning. I'd gotten back Dyan's second draft. Some bits still needed work, but the section I mentioned above? Dramatic improvement. Along with making X itself sound much more desirable to have, she connected all the features in a way that clearly indicated how they accomplished X. I scribbled a big "GOOD!" on it; it was so much better.
But this being the second draft, the boss wanted a look at it himself (and I wanted him to look too, considering the exact status of our price and guarantee were in flux and up to him). ...and like a fool, I brought along the first draft as well. And I thought I'd complement Dyan by pointing out her rapid improvement on that one section. And Boss-man turns and says: "Why is it better?"
And despite my explanation about the improved energy, the better descriptions, and the way it all ties together; and finally my pleas that dammit, it's better, how can you not see it's superior in every way, like Philostrate begging Theseus to realize that "Pyramus and Thisbe" was not a "must see"... he just kept saying "we can't know for sure just yet." He wants to have two versions of this piece made, one with this particular section altered, and one with it exactly as it was in the first draft. He wants to see for himself which one gets the better response.
He was fine with all the other changes, most of which were minor, some of which probably won't make a bit of difference in terms of how many sales it draws in. He came up with several more changes on the spot and never acted like he wasn't sure they were good changes. Everything will be incorporated in both of the final drafts... except that one section change, which half our audience will now never see.
Sometimes I think he's doing this just to annoy me.
